So apparently my "B. Hussein Obama" group was wildly unsuccessful, unlike all the other facebook groups I've created or administered.
Let's analyze it piece by piece.
Title. B. Hussein Obama
It's funny cause it's innovative and provocative. And anybody who regularly watches Hannity & Colmes or reads a certain individual's provocative column should recognize where this came from.
1. B. Hussein Obama was born in Honolulu, HI. Nothing good comes out of Honolulu except for obese football players.
Funny cause it's true, unless you seriously like pineapples. I guess not many of you have been to Honolulu.
2. B. Hussein Obama turned to drugs due to his racial confusion as a teenager. I'm much more racially confused than B. Hussein Obama and I never did drugs.
Okay, fine. Not so funny, but he shouldn't have claimed he turned to drugs for something so god damn lame. That gives every hybrid white-latino or white-black an excuse for riding the mary jane bandwagon.
3. B. Hussein Obama does not favor profiling at airports. Tell your 85 year old grandmother Eunice to watch the fuck out.
This is funny because all old people have funny names such as Mildred or Eunice. It's also funny because the government refuses to hold more than two arabs at a time whilst they cavity search poor old Mississippi bred Eunice's vagina.
4. B. Hussein Obama, much like John Edwards, is a filthy scumbag lawyer. Fortunately, unlike Edwards, he is not a medium for dead paralyzed children.
Lawyers are scumbags, obviously. And I'm not even talking about the ACLU yet, which was about the caliber of Obama's lawyership.
Does anyone remember when John Edwards, who during his tenure as a scummy trial lawyer (and who is partially responsible for extremely high insurance premiums in America) was trying to defraud a doctor out of millions of dollars by putting on a dog and pony show in which he was the medium for a dead disabled girl? It was the epitome of trial lawyer scum.
5. B. Hussein Obama has used the word "ironclad" to describe the demand from his wife that he quit smoking. The last time someone used a word as stupid as "ironclad" was Al "Chubbycakes" Gore to describe his lunchbox... oops, I mean lockbox.
Ironclad Lockbox. Think back to 2000 you pathetic fools. And lunchbox, because we all know that Al Gore thinks of cheeseburgers all day.
6. B. Hussein Obama is a closet atheist. There are too many closets in the Democratic Party, but lets save Hillary Rodham Clinton for another facebook group.
Let's analyze it piece by piece.
Title. B. Hussein Obama
It's funny cause it's innovative and provocative. And anybody who regularly watches Hannity & Colmes or reads a certain individual's provocative column should recognize where this came from.
1. B. Hussein Obama was born in Honolulu, HI. Nothing good comes out of Honolulu except for obese football players.
Funny cause it's true, unless you seriously like pineapples. I guess not many of you have been to Honolulu.
2. B. Hussein Obama turned to drugs due to his racial confusion as a teenager. I'm much more racially confused than B. Hussein Obama and I never did drugs.
Okay, fine. Not so funny, but he shouldn't have claimed he turned to drugs for something so god damn lame. That gives every hybrid white-latino or white-black an excuse for riding the mary jane bandwagon.
3. B. Hussein Obama does not favor profiling at airports. Tell your 85 year old grandmother Eunice to watch the fuck out.
This is funny because all old people have funny names such as Mildred or Eunice. It's also funny because the government refuses to hold more than two arabs at a time whilst they cavity search poor old Mississippi bred Eunice's vagina.
4. B. Hussein Obama, much like John Edwards, is a filthy scumbag lawyer. Fortunately, unlike Edwards, he is not a medium for dead paralyzed children.
Lawyers are scumbags, obviously. And I'm not even talking about the ACLU yet, which was about the caliber of Obama's lawyership.
Does anyone remember when John Edwards, who during his tenure as a scummy trial lawyer (and who is partially responsible for extremely high insurance premiums in America) was trying to defraud a doctor out of millions of dollars by putting on a dog and pony show in which he was the medium for a dead disabled girl? It was the epitome of trial lawyer scum.
5. B. Hussein Obama has used the word "ironclad" to describe the demand from his wife that he quit smoking. The last time someone used a word as stupid as "ironclad" was Al "Chubbycakes" Gore to describe his lunchbox... oops, I mean lockbox.
Ironclad Lockbox. Think back to 2000 you pathetic fools. And lunchbox, because we all know that Al Gore thinks of cheeseburgers all day.
6. B. Hussein Obama is a closet atheist. There are too many closets in the Democratic Party, but lets save Hillary Rodham Clinton for another facebook group.
Let's not pretend that Barack Obama isn't an atheist. His uncomfortable wishy-washyness about religion when confronted with the issue (and refusal to talk firmly about it, or about anything for that matter) makes that perfectly clear.
Hillary Rodham Clinton is widely rumored to be a lesbian. I do believe she has erotic nude shots of Melissa Etheridge...perhaps with some Tammy Lynn Michaels thrown in for good measure.
7. B. Hussein Obama is related to Dick Cheney, which means he may have heart problems.
It's a joke people. It's making fun of how liberals and critics incessantly address Vice President Cheney's heart problems.
8. B. Hussein Obama describes people in his family as looking like retarted people such as Bernic Mac or old white bitches like Margaret Thatcher.
B. Obama really did describe his extended family as a model UN. He said he has people in his family that look like Bernie Mac (who I find retarted) and Margaret Thatcher (who I love, but find to be an old white bitch).
9. B. Hussein Obama's father herded goats - what a hick! Oh, and speaking of hick, his mother is from Wichita.
I'll give this one to you guys. It was stupid. But you know there are only hicks in Wichita.
10. B. Hussein Obama, despite being African-American and moderately wealthy, refuses to drive a Cadillac Escalade.
Now this one is just plain well executed and hilarious. No arguments there.
11. B. Hussein Obama lives on the South Side of Chicago. That's not even "westside" or "eastside"...bitches.
Okay, maybe I was accidentally thinking of Los Angeles. Nobody, who values their life at least, goes to the South of Los Angeles.
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I want to know if it was really that bad.
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